Showing posts tagged with: emotional challenges

Failure is an option

by Ros Kitson

10 12, 2010 | Posted in Uncategorized | 0 comments

Yesterday evening, a friend said he was thinking of auditioning for a part in our local. However he wasn't sure if he should because his mum has told him he can't sing. He asked me what I thought (well he might not of actually asked, but I volunteered my opinion anyway), which was that he should go for it as the experience was worth as much as the outcome.

 
It got me thinking of how often we don't try something for fear of failure. I think at least one of my parents has this philosophy: my dad has a strong identity with what he can and can't do. And my mum was very protective of me when I was younger so I'm sure would have tried to draw me away from anything that could cause me distress (like the disappointment of failure). I'm sure I'm not alone in having these experiences. But are they the best thing for us as we grow up?
 
I put a comment on Facebook yesterday which prompted a friend to point me towards Richard Branson's biography. He is one of the most famous examples of someone who failed over and over again in his quest to find success. I haven't read it yet but I've been told it's an inspiring read. It puts the whole failure issue into a different light.
 
In order to grow, we have to learn and the easiest way to do this is from our own life experiences. And in order to have experience, we must take action. If we're going to get better at something, we must have started off at a lower level of competence, so it therefore follows that we're going to fail a few times before we reach the level we call success.
 
So, while I wish my friend lots of luck with his audition, I also wish him the wisdom and growth that comes should he fail. And I thank him for being the inspiration for this blog post.

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Why am I feeling down?

by Ros Kitson

06 09, 2010 | Posted in Uncategorized | 0 comments

Over the last few days, I've been feeling that something isn't right. But as often happens with me, I haven't been able to put my finger on what. Symptoms have included irratability and slight discontentment with no obvious cause. My life is going well and I'm happy, so what has been going on? As is usual for me, I've assumed there is something rather deep from my past which is "coming up" and therefore have decided this is another great opportunity to clear some past stress in order to align my life with my current wishes and purpose. In the past when this happened, I'd stress out, I'd panic, I'd beat myself up (metaphorically) and even end up depressed, but these days I'm getting more familiar with the process. Here are 3 steps which help me go through this process in a safe way. Step one - breathe. Breath is our life force and the easiest way to free up blocked life energy is to breathe. So when I feel fearful or low or uncomfortable with any emotion, I focus on it and breathe deeply and slowly until the intensity passes. Step two - identify the feelings. It's very easy to say "I feel crap" but it's much more useful to be able to say "I feel frustrated" or "I feel irritated". As the process unfurls, these emotions will change, but I've found that honoring them and accepting them without understanding why I'm feeling them seems to be really important. Step three - notice the thoughts which run through our mind. Eventually I find myself thinking something which clearly doesn't serve me or agree with my conscious awareness. Things like "I don't deserve this" or "I'm no good" are common examples. In my past, I'd go along wtih them and spiral ever more downwards, but nowadays I sit up and take note. I see them as an outdated belief and and an opportunity for change. Kinesiology is a great tool for changing belief systems and I'm lucky enough to be able to work on myself, so I sat down today and did a balance on myself. Now with greater understanding and cleared stress, I'm continuing my day. And I haven't snapped at anything since then.

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